Category / ancestry

by Mary James

19. Port Elizabeth & East London, South Africa, Dec 7-10, 1937

The After the Trip Letter

Port Elizabeth and East London are bustling, growing cities, thriving as ports for the diamond mines and South Africa's young export business. Durban is cosmopolitan, cultured, as modern as most large American cities. I went with our British Captain in a Reo driven by a Mohammedan to a South African theater owned by a Jew, to see an American movie...had supper in a Dutch restaurant where we were served by turbaned Indian waiters...and rode back to the ship in a rickshaw pulled by a Zulu.

Side note: In 1937, the passenger cruise industry was not yet hopping, so activities at the ports were likely catered to those in the import/export trade, the mining industry, the military… so men, and then all the people who cater to them and their whims. As is often the case, port towns are playgrounds of booze and flooze for some; hard labor for others.

An aside: While Googling about things she mentions in the paragraph above, I discovered the ‘Reo’ car she mentions is a REO SPEED WAGON! Who knew!? To me that is a band. But first, it was a car.

For supper she goes Dutch, literally. Get it?!

I had to look up what Dutch foods are. There are surprisingly few Dutch restaurants here in New York City, despite it once being called New Amsterdam. Of the top 10 Dutch restaurants in NYC on Yelp, only two are actually Dutch, and one of those is an hour into New Jersey. Another has ‘Dutch’ in the name, but serves American food. Three are Belgian. One is a food hall without any Dutch cuisine.

Poor Dutch food!

Have you heard of poffertjes? I have not. And I have been to Amsterdam and I worked for a Dutch company for four years. Poffertjes are the most popular food there, according to Google. If this rarity-of-Dutch-cuisine was true also back in 1937, then it might have been quite exotic to eat in a Dutch restaurant. She does not comment on the food, which is out of character. Is that good or bad?! Were the poffertjes pleasant or poor?

The Day to Day Journal 

Tue. Dec. 7: Washing - and high time too. Sewed sail in afternoon, cut out the jib. Hike on boat deck, then topside for more sewing — only one more day at sea before Durban, and it must be done by then. 

9:45 p.m. — went on the bridge to see the chart of the Cape, watch the plotting of tonight's course. Tennents and crayfish sandwiches.

Side note: I know from my incredibly short stint as a student of sailing (I should have asked Helen if she forced her students to purposely capsize in the middle of winter) that a jib is a canvas-y thing, and I believe it is connected to the boom (which is the part that hit me in the head more than once during said class). (The real reason I gave up on classes is that they were far too early in the morning for a college student. Like 8am or something!)

Helen is taking her self-appointed sail-sewing job very seriously, with set-in-stone deadlines. The chart and plotting are of course also jobs she’s taken on. No tipsy squabbles over cribbage with the retirees for Helen!

(I think Tennents is a beer.)

Port Elizabeth 

half penny
penny ticky = 3 pennies
six pence
12 pence = 1 shilling = 1 bob
2 shillings = florin
2 1/2 shillings = half crown
20 shillings = 1 pound

Wed. Dec. 8: 5:00 a.m. — woke to see land ahead. Engines stopped about 5:45. Fine concrete wharf with many loading cranes. Shag got the bike off early and we rode out to the beach past Humewood to a beautiful cove, rocky, breakers tumbling in. Sat on the beach — idillic.

Side note: Land ahoy again! The vision of Helen and Shag zooming along the coast to a cove, then the sitting and taking it all in… m’waw!

Time for a family related aside… Helen’s grand nephews, the two sons of her sister Mary’s son, Bob, used to run a motorcycle shop in California. And I purchased a motorcycle from them in 1997ish when I was in college (a 1984 Kawasaki 305), and I lived by the sea, and riding along coast, with the misty air, salty breezes, and white caps crashing into jagged rocky walls was life affirming.

And even extra for her, Helen was experiencing it all with her crush. 

Back to the boat at 11:45. 

Changed clothes and walked in to town again. 

Lunch with Ruth and Daisy at Cleghorn's on the market square. The town is spotlessly clean, many new modernistic buildings. The tall square tower above the jetty is "To commemorate the landing here of British settlers in 1820". It was one of the first towns in Africa settled by the British. Ruth and I visited the museum (poor taxidermy of native animals). Beautiful tropical birds in the aviary: a red-orange one — a velvety black with a red spot and long black tail. The snake garden was hemmed in by hibiscus bushes and trumpet vine. Cobras, pythons, puff adders dozing pretty peacefully in the sun.

Side note: Can hibiscus bushes and trumpet vine keep snakes away from humans?? They are skinny, slithery, and sly (but not slippery. An ex I lived with for many years had a snake so I know all this, reluctantly, up close and personal).

East London

Thur. Dec. 9: Shag and I went ashore at 9:30, walked thru the town, out to the beach, life histories. Small town, built up recently, ultra modern architecture.

Side note: life histories = looove 👩‍❤️‍👨

A note folded up in Helen’s files from the trip, dated Dec 9, 1937

The note above was written on Dec 9, 1937 (the day that the life-history-sharing was going on) and I want to think it was from Shag to Helen and that they met up in the sail loft, where all work on sails was halted so they could flirt. (The main part doesn’t look like her handwriting; but the date written at the bottom does, hence it was to her and she added the date for memory purposes.)

In the harbor are 3 square-riggers out of Finland, "Killoran", "Pamir", "Viking". Went aboard the "Viking" (built Sweden, 1907) she is unloading lumber, next goes to Australia for grain, (4 masted barque), crew of 16, young boys learning to sail, 2 Americans, Finns, Swedes, Danes, Capt. has his wife aboard, and an Australian girl is working her way home as mess girl. They are not radio-equipped, keep off the steamship lanes.

Side note: Seems well equipped to be a pirate ship, no? Lurking through the night with no radio… maybe ‘lumber’ and ‘grain’ are code names for types of illicit loot. 

Worked on sail in afternoon, and in evening, my usual hike and a game of ping-pong and Tennents with Chief. 10 — 45 knots tonight, have a 5-knot current. Many planes flying about. Mail plane came in Trimotor Junkers, some RAF formation flying.

Side note: Was she bugging the mailman for plane specs?? I hope she asked to fly it.

Fri. Dec. 10: Topside at 10:30 to finish sewing the corners on the jib. Put grommets in the corners of both sails and she's ready for action. At 3:00 p.m. we were being piloted into Durban harbor, dropped anchor, it began to rain. First word was we'd stand by for the Silvercedar to vacate her berth, but later it was decided to spend the night at anchor. Shag and I were going ashore, but it was too wet. Captain showed Ruth and me Mr. Dreyer's movies of the canal of New Orleans, of me painting the lifeboat. Called on Jim and Shag, saw some of their pictures.

Side note: If she’s only just heading up to finish the jib at 10:30am, she must have been quite confident she’d finish before Durban (her self-imposed deadline).

‘Vacate her berth…’ sounds more dramatic than it is, which is just a ship moving.

And a video! How cool it must have been in 1938 to see film of yourself moving around. I hope Mr. Dreyer’s relatives were bequeathed that film and that they kept it and that it is living somewhere.

by Mary James

12. A Brother in Awe, Olympics, Barometers, Sendoffs

A Brother in Awe

While all the booze cruising and high flying was going on, Helen received a letter from her soon to be brother-in-law, Walter J. McLaren, a 31-year-old banker from Brooklyn (specifically, we think, Bedford Stuyvesant). Walt is about to marry Helen’s baby sister, Mary (my grandmother and namesake), who was 24 and had recently graduated from Skidmore College with a degree in Home Economics. Helen, like Walter, was 31.

Here are the best bits of the letter (with some commentary):

Dear Helen, 

I received your letter to Mary today and write to accept my appointment as junior postmaster for the Skinners. Your handwriting on the envelope made me feel quite guilty so I hastened to make amends with my future sister-in-law by acknowledging with thanks your Christmas card and your welcome into the family.

Side note: Always good to start humble, with an ‘at your service’ vibe, all the while flattering (he offers to work for them and compliments her handwriting, which is, though tiny, impeccable). 

It gave me a new thrill when I realized that in addition to having a lovely wife I am going to have a sister too. I have always wanted one and I look forward to really knowing you. Mary has told me a lot about you so that I feel that my new sister is not entirely a stranger but I must admit I stand in awe of your many accomplishments. I hope you will like me and feel entirely at ease and comfortable in our home. We hope to make it a place where you can breathe freely even though your breath should be scented with the enticing musty aroma of beer.

Side note: Her CV was quite remarkable already in 1935, so he’s correct to be in awe. ‘I hope you will like me…’ is about the cutest thing ever, considering they are peers. The home Walter and Mary would make was a cozy one in New Jersey, with their soon to be children — eventually three, including my mother. And if banking didn’t work out for Walt, based on that last sentence about beer, he coulda written copy for the ad business a la Don Draper. 

If my writing isn’t legible or coherent, blame it on the pen which occasionally imagines itself a syringe and discharges its ink with a startling effect. Personally I think it’s ashamed of me and belches with embarrassment.

Side note: If he wrote ads for the pen industry, he coulda easily taken down a competitor.

Now that I have done the polite thing of introducing myself in somewhat stilted style, of making my apologies, of giving my thanks and explaining my eccentric manner of writing, I am free to devote the rest of this letter to my one subject, Mary.

Side note: SO CUTE! 

As I think you realized I have been in the past no better than I should have been and posed as a professional cynic. I suppose that judged by strictly Presbyterian standards I am condemned to burn in the everlasting fires of Hell but instead it seems that I am to be warmed by happiness of a true perfect love. I shall always be grateful to Mary for teaching me a new way to view life and a promise of a beautiful future.

Side note: I’m not sure what that first part means. That he was on the wrong track until he met Mary? Not sure, but before seeing this letter, I’d only known my grandparents through pictures and tales of a quiet family home, with the three quiet children and a beloved cocker spaniel, CoCo. That Walt was so emotive about his bride-to-be is excellently sweet. ‘A true perfect love…’. It just makes me want to squeeze them all. And we don’t often squeeze. 

I am writing to you of these things as I feel that you will want to know and I am sure that you will understand. I also realize that if the ravings of a love blinded boy bore you a perfect defense is open to you. I don’t usually warn my victims but I feel friendly toward you. I wish you could have seen Mary at Christmas you could then understand me. Mary radiates a halo of joy and love that causes people to look at her with a soft light in their eyes. Do you believe I love her?

Side note: I do! I do! He’s so gushy, but without hyperbole, I think. He just seems straight up smitten.

I do a great deal of thinking about what our life together is going to be. I want Mary to have a full life and her own life. I do not intend to imprison her with rules and restrictions and I am afraid that I shall resent outside interference with her choice of living. You no doubt can advise me about this point as my Mary is a poor diplomat I have found. That trait seems to be characteristic of the Scotch. I think I had better close this letter and reserve something for the future. I want to repeat my invitation to make our home your home and our garage your garage.  With hope for a genuine understanding, I am. 

Your brother, 

Walter
Walter McLaren (Helen’s soon to be brother-in-law) introduces himself in a doting letter, 1935

Too sweet. And bitter sweet. From what I know, they lived a happy life, raising the three children in Essex Fells, New Jersey. Walter was the Vice President of a local bank. Mary was a homemaker. I unfortunately never met her, as she passed away of heart disease at a far too young 58, and I had yet to come along. I was however named after her, including her middle name, Elizabeth). Walter I met once, if you call an adult meeting a two year old ‘meeting’. Evidence below.

What’s been told of them is that they — like the rest of us — were not timid or shy necessarily, but words were not wasted. But then in the Booze Cruise post, Helen is a social butterfly and this letter, my grandfather is being silly and emotive. So everything is topsy turvy. But in the best ways. We all have our moments.

I’m getting off track, as this is not about Helen, but you will see soon how I circle back.

Some visuals of Mary and Walter and fam to go along with all this:

The first picture, of the child in the white hat, fancy coat, and boots, is Walter. Hehe.

Then they grow up, meet, have kiddos, and then, in one of my favorite photos of all time, likely taken in the 1950s, they appear to be opening presents on Christmas morning (they look so perfectly disheveled in such a 1950s way).

Though I don’t have pictures of Helen and Mary together aside from when they were children, I found this from a letter Helen wrote in the 1980s about their relationship:

"Mary and I scarcely knew each other when we were growing up. I was away at school, or away teaching (U of Cincinnati, U of Kentucky, Smith College, U of Minnesota, Purdue, Gulf Park College (a junior college in Gulfport Miss). But from 1946 we saw each other more often. She and Walter came to Vanc and we went east and we became devoted to each other. She and Walter were very active in community affairs and were much revered and admired. In 1961 M had an open heart operation and she felt after that she was living on borrowed time. But she had eight good years after that and never stopped her activities."

Helen would outlive her baby sister by over 30 years.

III Olympics

And now a few final items I found from her teaching era, before we set sail around the world. I have framed on my wall two tickets to the 1932 Winter Olympics, in Lake Placid, New York. These were the III Olympic Winter Games, and they were the first Olympics held in the United States. The competing countries, not surprisingly, were mostly in North America and Europe. In attendance there were 17 nations, with a total of 252 athletes (21 of them women). Curling was played even! How very Upper North American.

Though the world was still suffering from a global depression, attendance was low and the games were almost cancelled, the show went on.

The top ticket (at double the price of the second one) was likely for the closing ceremonies. How fun.

Helen studied, lived, and loved athletics and I hope she enjoyed the games as much, if not more, than the did the Jai Alai game she attended in Havana a few years later.

Barometer Reader

Another item in my possession is a cool looking barometer. It resides next to our front door, and is always set as it appears below: Rain with a chance of Changeable. The mechanics inside the thing do not move on their own, but I haven’t fiddled with it to know if they might (not that me fiddling with it would help, but perhaps one of the many engineers in the family could help — and if they’re reading this then the pressure is on!).

There are two ‘hands’ to the barometer. The gold one moves around manually via the knob in the middle. The blue one is controlled internally (or would be if it worked). And what I probably once learned but had forgotten is that barometers measure atmospheric pressure, and that’s what they were used for in aviation. The webs explain it better than I can.

The little blue plane on top seems an add on. The back is engraved: Helen Skinner, Gulf Park A.A., 1933. Perhaps this was a gift after she got her pilot’s license.

May your days be forever Fair, my friends!

A Long Goodbye

The card below reads: “Dear Miss Skinner, may every hour of your trip give you joy and the fulfillment of your most roseate dreams. You deserve every cherished blessing and every supreme happiness. All of us here at Gulf Park love, admire and appreciate you. Sincerely, Elizabeth Maddox Cox.”

Roseate is a word I either forgot (most likely) or never knew. But it is my new favorite word. A nice sentiment, but Helen would certainly not need roseate colored glasses where she was going.

The note above isn’t dated, but we will be assuming that it was written from Gulf Park College to Helen before she left on her freight boat trip around the world. It would mean she was taking time off from teaching, as the trip would last five months. I am not sure if she resigned her position at the school before she left, but if she didn’t, she would right after she returned. The trip truly turned her life on its head, because afterwards, she’d never lived in the U.S. again.

So now, for reals, we’re gonna start the next chapter. Leave your roseate colored glasses behind!

by Mary James

9. Posture Parades, a Field Trip, a Binder Full of Family, & the 13 Colonies

I was wrapping up the ‘The Early Years’ section, with Helen exiting the U.S. for the first time in the early 1930s to voyage around Central America, but then two things happened. One Google thing, and the other a weekend upstate where Helen was born and spent summers.

Posture Parades

While Googling schools where Helen taught, I found a write up by her in a yearbook online. It declares, “Miss Helen Skinner, Director of Physical Education, Gulf Port College, Gulfport, writes, ‘Sailing, canoeing, surfboard riding, boat trips to Ship Island for swims in the surf, bicycle trips, long walks on the sea wall, picnics on the beach, moonlight horseback rides — these are some of the activities that make the Athletic Association at Gulf Park one of the most popular and important organizations on the campus. We are proud of our 100 per cent attendance…at our third Annual All-School Play Day…competition was keen and colorful in tennis, golf driving, ping-pong, deck tennis, horseshoe pitching, posture parade.’*

*Posture parade!

The below looks like she is dressed for one of those moonlight horseback rides, no?

Helen Skinner, 1936, Gulf Port College, Mississippi

A Field Trip, a Binder Full of Family, & the 13 Colonies

Charlton, New York, where Helen spent summers, have an historical society. I messaged them on Facebook. They wrote back, saying they would look into the names I mentioned.

I wrote again about a month later when I was planning a trip, asking if I could say hi. Unbeknownst to me, they had been digging deep into the families and had surfaced with a boat load of facts and connections going all the way back to Braintree, England in the 1500s. And found that the Skinners were settlers in the first 13 colonies.

They researched, typed, scanned, organized, printed, and presented it in a binder. It has copies of census records, wills, cemetery plots, inventories, property records, bibles, birth records, death records, etc. Thank you to Erin Miller at the Charlton Historical Society!

From the binder, in short… back in Braintree, England, in 1560ish, William Skinner worked as a yeoman (either the owner of a small amount of land or a high ranking servant). A generation or so later, the Skinners traveled across the Atlantic to live in the new Connecticut Colony (one of the 13 founding ones). John Skinner is a FOUNDER of Hartford, CT. He is even buried in the Ancient Burying Ground in Hartford. And a relative from a subsequent generation has a headstone there that’s still legible.

The Skinners moved to Upstate New York in the mid-1700s and stayed until 1904 (at least Helen’s family line) when they moved to Manhattan.

Behold this:

This is a will or inventory from John Skinner dated 1690. If I were a handwriting analyst I might say he was a bit dramatic.

In Charlton, I toured an old one room school house and church that has been turned into a museum with many items from around the time Helen was growing up. Below are two of the transportation options.

The Old Scotch Church is where Helen was made to go on Sundays. The church there now isn’t the original, due to fires, but we can pretend it is. The church is where she pilfered candies in the summer with her cousin Betty back in and around 1910. There’s a vivid description of their time at the church by a relative here.

There’s a cemetery catty corner from it filled with family names. Helen’s parents, Frank and Gertrude are buried side by side. See below.

Above are the gravestones of Helen’s parents. Though they moved from upstate to Manhattan to Brooklyn to New Jersey, here they are together near where they met.

The Skinner house is no longer, and the Mead house (where summers were spent) couldn’t be found.

Many thanks once again to Erin at the Charlton Historical Society!

Now we jump ahead to when Helen takes a break from Posture Parades to country-hop around the Caribbean and Central America.